But can it be done? Can we dance when we are in pain and sore and covered in bruises, mud and scars?
Our collective dance of polar forces was clumsy at best and rather disastrous. We stepped on toes, twisted arms, made each other fall, pushed each other, drugged each other in the mud, crushed bones, and tore apart spirits. We turned the dance floor of joy into a battleground of will. But our solution of quitting dancing completely misses the point.
In our struggle to redress past imbalances, we inadvertently create new ones. The feminine principle, long suppressed, has become further obscured in our haste to adopt masculine modes of power. Masculinity, on the other hand, feels threatened and has become more stubborn and unyielding. We have lost touch with the fluid and intuitive nature of women, and men have become calcified caricatures of strength without vulnerability.
And our answer was to homogenize. In our quest to reshape power relations, we have often missed the mark, seeking equality through homogenization rather than embracing the rich tapestry of inherent differences.
Feminine and masculine are energies, not genders. In general, women embody more feminine energy and men embody more masculine energy, just in different proportions, and both genders have some of each energy. However, our society is highly unbalanced and structured around masculine forms of power. This imbalance forces those with strong connections to feminine energy to make impossible choices. Either you adopt a mode that is outside your core, or you are ignored as being unrespected, unpaid, and have less freedom. It also disconnects and unhelps those who are “lucky” to have more masculine energies, because it cuts them off from the vulnerability and power of the feminine, both internally and relationally.
From deterioration to extinction
The discussion began with whether women are classified as humans or are they closer to animals. Possessed? , just breasts and a uterus? A silent vessel for breeding new humans for generations, servants, slaves, hysterical, incapable of reason, must be virgins, but refuses to give it up with little effort. When – she's a bitch, when she gives – she's a bitch – a slut and a whore…
A property to be claimed and stamped all over. If you're lucky you might be loved, but always at least a little bit more if not more.
After going through this shit for too long, we rebel and we want to be equal, we want to be seen, we want to be heard, we want to be better, but in the sense that we're equal Even though so many people end up looking too much like men and don't know what to do to become a girlfriend.
We have won our rights, but we have lost our essence. We have more freedom, but we have lost touch with our core. It has become easier to live in this world as a woman, but it has become harder to be H:ER. Ta.
The pitfalls of soft equality
In our efforts to dismantle deeply entrenched patriarchal systems, many have sought alternative dynamics in relationships and organizations. These are often relaxed versions aimed at equality and fairness. But in reality, these well-intentioned aspirations create confusion, although perhaps more balanced than the inheritance of patriarchy. We find ourselves uncertain and unable to reach our full potential. In our pursuit of equality, we have become more homogenized, more confused, and inadvertently stifled growth and failed to meet our deepest needs. This forced homogenization not only feels inauthentic and inauthentic, but it also inhibits our growth and maturity that comes with realizing our full power. It's as if we're forever frozen in the immaturity and awkwardness of our teens, unable to grow into adults with the sense of fulfillment and responsibility that comes with self-authority.
From zero sum to mutual empowerment
What if, instead of viewing electricity as a finite resource to be divided equally, we reconceptualized it as a dynamic, circular system? A zero-sum game where one side's gain is the other's loss, or a misguided attempt at fairness? Rather than something creeping up on you, power can be a force for mutual improvement. The power to be ourselves, to embody a unique blend of masculine and feminine polarities, both in who we are, in our relationships, and in the way we structure our lives. Stepping into this power will inspire others to do the same. By dancing with that power, even greater power is generated and invigorates everyone involved.
This approach takes us beyond equality through homogenization and depolarization to a realm of equality through the dynamic interplay of polarities. It respects the different modes of operation that are unique to us in different proportions and allows for fluid and continuous exchange. Through this dance, we uplift and empower each other, maximizing the expression of our unique strengths.
Conducting: Masculine Power
The energy to command comes from the authority you earn through your actions. It is rooted in a clear vision and the ability to achieve desired results. It declares, “Do what I say and meet your needs for control, architecture, and guidance.” This energy is measured, pervasive, and commands respect through adherence to direction and willingness to be led. It asks for vulnerability and surrender.
Authority here is gained through behavior, adherence to norms and principles, and external achievements. The masculine path involves starting from the bottom and training upwards. It requires both humility and control. It takes humility to learn, to be guided, and to do what needs to be done, even if it's uncomfortable. To take control to perform, to learn new skills, to be effective, purposeful, and directed.
This journey builds the ability to handle power, learn how to be a teacher and student, how to command and serve, and switch between control and openness as needed. It is a path to discipline, gaining power through discipline and transcending personal limitations. Those who remain hesitant, undisciplined, or overly concerned with pleasing others find it difficult to find strength on this path.
The masculine path teaches us to master CNTRL-SHFT-SRNDR (Control-Shift-Surrender). Paradoxically, surrender loosens control and, if not balanced, leads to a loss of control over oneself. This imbalance causes a person to control everything from the outside and avoid the need for ever-increasing vulnerability. An imbalance leads to an insatiable thirst for external control, as more control requires a deeper capacity to be vulnerable.
True mastery lies in the ability to use control as a means of service, to dance between control and surrender, and to hold onto power without being corrupted by it.
VO:CO-PWR – Voice of Power
CNTRL Without control, you can't give me away. Without the surrender of SRNDR, it cannot be held.
Don't think about me Before you learn the art of CNTRL-SHFT-SRNDR (Control Shift Surrender)
Do not come before me or I will destroy you and everything.
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